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Horrible first draft!

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Voltech Class 100 Hero Joined: 26 Apr 2006 Posts: 152 Location: in front of the computer	Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 3:38 pm    Post subject: Horrible first draft!   well since no one else is posting I guess I will. It's horrible! i Read it for a second time after it had been posted and caught many many errors and going to revise it. _________________ I didn't 'cause I could if i wanted too ~T.H.
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PhoenixHawk Man of Steel Joined: 26 Apr 2006 Posts: 442 Location: as if anyone really gives a crap	Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 8:56 pm    Post subject:   reviews have been a little slow of late...I personally am on a trip right now and having trouble keeping up. I'm trying to catch up with Pastarican's newest, and pick up the newer stuff as well. Don't beat yourself up too badly..we all make some grammatical and spelling errors. The feel of the story works, and as is evidenced in most of your latest writing, it continues to grow and improve. There are some parts that could be smoother, but overall it starts a very cool sounding new tale. Press on, we're waiting to see where it will go. D
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Ockham Freedom Phalanx Founding Member Joined: 25 Apr 2006 Posts: 876 Location: I give a crap!	Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 2:41 pm    Post subject:   Quote: Watch out for your sentence/paragraph length. I am noterious for writing small sentences so be free to incorporate them into bigger version. And remember moderation. Quote: Ill keep that in mind. Very nice otherwise. Looks like Volt has unfinished business and can't leave is past like he hoped. _________________ Need a break from COH Fan Fiction? Try www.AnthonyHarte.com A Sci-Fi Fantasy Source.
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