Joined: 26 Apr 2006 Posts: 827 Location: I give a crap too ;) .
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 12:06 pm Post subject: Dark Seed
Not 100% posative that this belongs here but what the heck, someone will read it.
Must have missed this story when it was first posted. RL has a way of dogging you down sometimes. But excellent story all the same. I might suggest that your change in perspective/ location/ time be marked in some way. For instance
* * *
or something like that. It would help to make the changes more smooth and obvious as well as limit any confusion on the part of the reader.
That poor skull at the end seemed to be quite a dope, but newbs can be that way sometimes. Hope to get a chance to finish up reading this series this week.
Regards!
_________________ Murphey's Laws of Combat
"A sucking chest wound is natures way of telling you to slow down."
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